People have a lot of opinions to share with brides who are planning their wedding days... and when I say a lot, I mean A LOT. They give advice on what colors are best, what time of year is most ideal, what kind of shoes to wear, who to invite, and so on and so forth. It is never ending. So please, don't worry, I'm not going to tell you what flowers to have in your bouquet or how to do your hair. Instead, I'm going to share something that was much more valuable to me and had NOTHING to do with the wedding details.
When I was a stressed out bride-to-be, hurriedly trying to figure out last minute details, a friend of mine sat me down and said "I'm going to give you some advice." Normally, I have little to no temper, but it was VERY late, I couldn't remember the last time I had slept without panicked wedding dreams, and my eyes were a little blood shot. Let's just say that she was taking a huge risk considering I was on the edge of some evil, bridezilla mania.
She took me by the shoulders and started with, "Something is going to go terribly wrong, and IT IS OK." As weird as this sounds, the wave, sorry the TSUNAMI, of panic actually started to drift. The entire week before our wedding, when everything got real very quickly, EVERYONE was telling me that EVERYTHING was going to be perfect and not to worry at all. They meant well, and they deserve all the thanks in the world for trying to calm this tormented bride-to-be, but what I really needed to hear was something very different. The idea of everything being perfect is what really keeps bride-to-be's up at night.
So to all the brides out there NOT wanting any more advice, here is mine for you:
Something IS going to go catastrophically wrong, but whatever terrible thing does happen, it doesn't really matter. You WILL marry the love of your life even if every flower wilts, even if the rain comes down, and even if everyone hates food. Relax, it is NOT going to be perfect but it is going to be the best day of your life.
Our "something wrong"
The night before our wedding, with all our closest family and friends gathered, we patiently waited for our pastor to arrive at the rehearsal. After about 30 minutes past the time we were supposed to meet, I called him up and found out that he had mixed up our wedding date and was currently on bed rest from a recent surgery! Now let's pause here for a second to really grasp what was happening. The ONE person other than Will and I that was absolutely necessary for us to get married was NOT going to be there AND it was 24 hours before the start of the wedding...
We took all the apologies from our pastor and told him it was ok and to get good rest. After all, these things happen, and it's ok! There were about 10 different friends and family members who immediately signed up to marry us. It was rather comical at that point. I had no idea how many of our family and friends were willing to get ordained online at the drop of a hat! Love you all!! But, in the end, we got set up with an associate pastor from the church that we had never met. To this day, people ask why I wasn't in a melt down at that moment and, honestly, it's because I already knew something was going to go wrong!
In case anyone was wondering, the associate pastor was a blessing. He kept everyone laughing on a very cold and windy day, made us feel so comfortable, and really made us feel at home even though we had never met him before! We still go listen to him and our pastor on Sundays and just smile when we think of this story.